Pet Loss and Grief with Beth Bigler, Part 1
Beth Bigler is a double-certified Pet Loss Grief Counselor, certified end-of-life animal companion doula and pet chaplain. She works with individuals and families before, during, and after the loss of their beloved animal companions. She’s also known for her Instagram account @honoringouranimals where she shares inspirational and empowering daily content and tips about pet loss grief which are a unique blend of humor, compassion, and “telling it like it is.” She works closely with animal care workers, veterinary professionals, and other pet industry brands on grief training and awareness and is a regular contributor to podcasts, articles, and other media.
The anticipated and eventual loss of Beth’s soulmate cat, Arnie, led her to seek out her own pet loss grief support, which profoundly aided her healing. It was lifesaving and transformative. In the middle of that process, she had the opportunity to help a stranger at the vet’s office who faced an unexpected euthanasia decision. She realized that she wanted to help others integrate loss into their lives and empower them on their grief journey.
Beth is also a seasoned film/television professional, college instructor, and mom of a son and two fantastic felines!.
When we lose a pet, it's not just an animal that we're saying goodbye to—it's a cherished member of our family, a companion who has shared in the ebb and flow of our daily lives. The pain of such a loss is profound, often misunderstood, and, at times, minimized by the world around us. However, as Beth Bigler, a pet loss and grief counselor, articulates in a recent podcast episode, our grief is valid, and navigating through it requires both time and support.
Beth's journey into grief counseling began with the diagnosis and eventual loss of her soulmate cat, Arnie. This experience unveiled the need for specialized support for those mourning their furry friends—a need that often goes unaddressed. Her transformation from a career in Hollywood to a dedicated pet loss counselor highlights the universal truth that grief can lead to new paths and purpose.
Anticipatory grief is a particular kind of pain that pet owners face, marked by the knowledge that their pet's time is limited. The emotional toll of making end-of-life decisions for our companions can be overwhelming. Yet, it's crucial to find ways to connect with our pets in their final days and to practice self-care. The concept of a "fuck it plan" is introduced, encouraging pet owners to allow their pets to indulge in their favorite activities and to create lasting memories. This chapter of the episode serves as a reminder to cherish the joy that pets bring to our lives, even as we prepare for their departure.
The subsequent stages of grief that follow the loss of a pet can be tumultuous, often accompanied by a range of emotions including anger, guilt, and confusion. The episode emphasizes the importance of professional support during these times, whether through counseling or community groups. Such resources can offer a guiding light through the fog of bereavement.
Invalidation from others can compound the difficulty of grieving a pet. The episode offers guidance on how to deal with insensitive remarks and the significance of surrounding oneself with empathetic support. This recognition of the need for understanding touches upon the emotional isolation many pet owners feel in their grief.
Beth also delves into the feelings of anger and guilt that are commonly experienced during grief. Understanding that these emotions stem from unmet needs and expectations can provide comfort and validation. The episode encourages the expression of anger in healthy ways and the acknowledgment that guilt, often irrational, is a natural part of the grieving process.<br><br>Grieving is not a linear journey, and self-compassion is key in navigating the process. Techniques like grounding exercises and breaking cycles of negative self-talk can offer solace. The discussion in this chapter is a poignant reminder that the tools for coping with grief are not often talked about, yet they are vital to healing.
Finally, the episode concludes with an exploration of the patterns of grief, acknowledging that there is no set timeline for the healing process. It's a reassurance that the intense waves of sorrow will eventually give way to a more manageable grief, as individuals find tools to cope and adapt to life after loss.
Losing a pet is an experience that touches the very core of our being. This podcast episode with Beth Bigler serves as a compassionate companion for those in the throes of pet loss grief. It's a conversation filled with gentle wisdom and understanding, providing a beacon of hope for the journey towards peace and acceptance.
Listen to full episode :